Groundlessness

So probably the biggest thing I did was to apply for the job at Sichuan University. The fact that I would apply for a permanent position in Chengdu shows how badly I am doing at handling this my current state. In fact, when I think about it, this state of being nobody doing nothing, as much as I might decry it, gets awfully close I think to the sense of groundlessness Buddhism does so much to try to instill in us. I have to say, I don't think anyone could possibly be more groundless than myself right now. Everything I have known, everything that has defined me is gone. And that fact that I would grasp at the SU job shows how much I am desperately trying to run away from groundlessness.